The truth isn't always stranger than fiction. In these cases, it totally is.
You have to admire him for trying.
"That's our job!"
Thanks alot BREXIT.
Because illegal immigrants destroy countries, DUH.
"So dad PROMISED to get me a car by the time I turned 18, yet here I am, a week after my birthday and no car keys in my hand..."
I'd rather have songs than petty ass tweets.
I don't blame her, Elrond does seem pretty majestic.
I don't need hackers finding out what I'm planning to eat for lunch, thank you very much.
Yeah, domestic rapists are way less scary.
I mean she was already in trouble...
"Are you sure Arizona wasn't on the list, officer?"
Great, so now the delivery guys can at least get exercises while playing ding-dong-ditch with your packages.
This is the face of the man who's already planning all of the things he's going to buy with his settlement money.
Be easy on them, it's Georgia. They think 2 inches of snow is a big deal.
Gonna lay off the dried meats for a while.
Well since the internet is all cat memes it's pretty much the same thing.
Wow, I know it's only the beginning of the year but this guy may be in the running for dumbest criminal of 2017.