HAHAHAHAHA. Nope, just the one, but thanks for that.
What the hell am I supposed to do with that?
Oh, I’m sorry — will YOU be carrying “the next one” and paying for its college education? NO? Then let’s just worry about the one I’m having now.
And that’s your choice! I’m excited about mine! Isn’t it great to decide what’s right for yourself?
Shouldn’t you shut the hell up and hand me a doughnut?
I HAVE TO? Says who? How about I just work on keeping myself and my baby healthy and happy?
And maybe I still do! It’s lovely to have options.
I’m gonna stop you riiiiight there. Please don’t give me your internet-sourced advice on the healthcare of my child.
No, really. You don’t.
I’m pretty sure my body is still right here, growing a miracle.
I know! But, I decided to have one anyway. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Yes. This conversation actually happened to me.
I’m having a baby, not dying. But thanks for your faith in our friendship.
Um, our parenting style is keep the kid alive, and try to raise someone who is not a total asshole.